Gratitude 2016 From A-Z

Once again I shamelessly steal a friend’s annual Thanksgiving message on her Facebook page. Under my government, upon giving two attributions I may hereafter call this idea my own. If Trump feels he can change libel laws, I can make up my own rules too. Welcome back to the eighties– greed is good!

Below is my list of those things from A to Z for which I am grateful this year. Appropriate mine as you wish, but do understand that your own results may vary.

I am grateful for…

(A). My anal-retentive gene. Thanks, Mom!

(B). The block feature on a cell phone. I’ve only used it a handful of times, but I’m awfully grateful for its invention. I’m noticing that family members of mine also use it.

(C). Candles. When you’ve lived through one Florida hurricane you realize how important they can be.

(D). Democracy. It’s messy and full of painful hostilities. But in the end it’s a system worth fighting for and holding dear. Fasten your seat belts…

(E). Electricity. See (C) above.

(F). Florida weather. In spite of hurricanes, sinkholes, and rising sea levels, I’m where I want to be.

(G). My lovely Gorgeous, continually making my life worth living.

(H). Health insurance. Grateful to have it, and I do pray everyone will be able to keep theirs next year.

(I). Index funds. To the extent that any of us can sleep at night thinking about our money, they do at least help in that process.

(J). Jewish Mothers. If Only Donald Trump was the son of one, we’d all be so much better off right now (NOTE: I wrote this on last year’s post, but I thought it was worth recycling).

(K). Kale — the absolute worst representative of the vegetable family. This is actually a shout-out to Tanya at the rapidcyclist blog. I told you I’d find a way to work it in a future post!

(L). Love. I for one still believe it trumps hate.

(M). The mainstream media. Now more than ever.

(N). Nagilas. “Have a nagila, have two nagilas, have three nagilas, they’re very small.” There’s a little Borscht Belt in all of us.

(O). OPM, the federal government’s Office of Personnel Management. Of course, I’m not really grateful for it at all. But perhaps if I act like I am they’ll stop screwing up my pension. Yeah, let’s go with that.

(P). The popular vote. So much for “rigged,” eh?

(Q). The Queen, Her Majesty Elizabeth the Second. In a year where really no politician looked very good, she reigns above them all. Pun intended. You’re the boss, Lizzie!

(R). Retroactive payments. I had two this year because of retirement paperwork problems (see “O”above). While I wasn’t happy for the actual reasons they were made retroactive, it was nice getting a big chunk of change all at one time. Cha-Ching!

(S). Single malt scotch. There’s always a bottle of it in our liquor cabinet, but it’s only brought out for special occasions. I need a lot more “Cha-Chings!” in my life to have it more often. For me, it’s the dictionary definition of smooth.

(T). Roast turkey with all the trimmings. My absolute favorite meal.

(U). Unions. Much maligned these days, but I will always be grateful for the indirect benefits I enjoyed as a child from one via a parent who was a card-carrying member. Solidarity forever!

(V). Our veterans. Lest we forget…

[W]. WiFi. When you’re sitting buck naked for 40 minutes in the examining room waiting for the doctor to come back, at least you have a  means to let your Twitter followers know how pissed you are about it.

(X). Xanax. What did I do for dental appointments before this was invented? Oh, yeah, I sweated and panicked a lot.

(Y). YouTube. My absolute favorite way to waste time. Thank you for all those moments that you saved me from paying bills, writing a family member, learning a second language, etc. Watching Paul Lynde compilations on Hollywood Squares was so much more enjoyable.

(Z). Robert Allen Zimmerman. You gotta hand it to someone whose “prior commitments” prevent him from being honored with a Nobel prize. That takes keeping it real to a very profound place. Well done, Bob. And congratulations too.

From our home to yours, we wish you a very beautiful holiday season. Peace.

Until next time…